06 Dec The Challenges of Dieting and Socializing
Dieting and Socializing
My calendar is officially packed with holiday parties, not to mention all of the work-related events that I have to remain in tip-top shape for. I have an amazingly supportive team of positive friends and family who completely understand my goals and vision, but they aren’t always the people at the party that I get to socialize with.
More often than not, there’s a “critical eye” keeping track of everything I do (and don’t) eat and drink, and providing…commentary.
Now I’m incredibly lucky – I happen to live in an extremely fitness-friendly community, so the lengths I go to in making good food choices and asking for modified menu items (or even bringing my own snacks to munch on in my purse) when in social situations are well-received.
However, a majority of my clients don’t have the same luck, and that’s why I thought dieting and socializing would make a great topic to discuss. Let’s dispel the negativity. Let me give you the ammo you need to fight the haters!
I often experience the critical eye when I visit back home. We go out to dinner and what I see as making good choices disrupts someone else`s comfort level with their own body image. But that’s just it – it’s THEIR comfort level, NOT mine! So you’re out, and a friend orders fried calamari and you order a grilled chicken salad. You know you made the right choice, but all of a sudden they become self-conscious of their own order. You might hear “Oh I bet you think this is so gross” or “You must think I’m so fat”. The best approach in this situation is to remind yourself that their comments are not about you in any way, it’s all about them. Remain gracious, don’t play into their defensiveness or self-consciousness. A compliment sent their way often deflects the commentary. You can even offer to share your salad – they might just take you up on it!- The same thing might happen when you’re ordering a meal and ask the restaurant to change it or leave things off. Commentary claiming that you’re difficult, a primadonna, obsessed, or too picky might come out. Again, this is NOT really about you. Don’t get defensive! Offer to share your knowledge. Stay positive and let people know that you personally FEEL better when you eat a certain way, and that makes you HAPPY.
- DON’T sit there moaning and groaning about everything you can’t have. Your nutrition choices are just that – YOUR choices! If you complain about making a lifestyle change, there will be plenty of people encouraging you to just “get what you want”, “don’t worry so much” or “it’s just one night – you only live once”. People complaining don’t really want to be making these changes, and people listening to the complaints will do anything they can to shut them up!
- DON’T complain incessantly if you go out and make those bad choices on your own. Acknowledge and move on. Now this isn’t an excuse to veer off course, but it’s reality as we don’t live in a social vacuum. Your friends and family certainly don’t want to hear you complain (especially about the same choices they just made themselves!), and they will be the first to discourage you from engaging in another program anytime soon.
In regards to social situations with alcohol, the easiest path to take is to claim the position of designated driver. Nobody will critique you for not partaking in any alcoholic beverages if you’re the one responsible for their safety. If no driver is necessary (thank you Uber), always have a glass of water in-hand and order your own drinks. Again, keep in mind that when someone gets confrontational about your not drinking, it’s really about their own comfort level, not about whether or not you’re participating.
And what do I do when people give me the “critical eye” for bringing my own snacks to a party? I flash them a big smile, give them a fabulous flip of my hair, and graciously offer them some!
Excuses or Solutions, You Decide!
Natalie Jill
